I’m dreaming of a warm Christmas
Unlike the chilly ones I used to know,
Where native trees are greener, birdier, and leaner,
Unweighted as they are by laden snow.

Church-goers here and everywhere. Surprise!
Could I have left the wintry North for this?
Bible-belts worn tightly render me unsightly.
I’m ready now to sign an armistice.

I asked that wise old owl who seldom speaks
To help me find a nicely balanced perch.
He ruffled up his cloak, pondered some, then spoke:
“Find yourself a Unitarian Church.”

So from this balanced perch I say,
“Have a Happy Holiday.”